Life

The human body has a wonderful immune system that fights any foreign cell that enters the body. It fights any bacteria or virus that enters our body, which our bodies recognise as foreign elements. During COVID-19 times, many patients developed autoimmune disorders wherein the immune system becomes over-aggressive and starts attacking various of our own cells. The doctors had to administer many medicines that would suppress the immune system by administering steroids . This sense of "I" within human beings also works like an immunity system. It protects us, "me" and "mine", from the foreign elements that may be dangerous to the survival of "me" and "mine". Like the immune system, it also has many layers. The first layer is the skin, which prevents foreign elements from entering our body. Similarly, we ignore many people who may be dangerous. For example, we often tell children not to join a group of druggists and criminals because t...

 It's interesting to see how the concept of "I" and "mine" is so ingrained in our psyche. Do we love anybody? We say that we love our family members. Do we really? When we interact with the children, we find that many of them are quite stressed due to the fear of failing to meet their parents' expectations . Will any loving person have expectations? If parents expect their children to achieve something and become sad when they are unable to achieve it, where is the love? Aren't children just tools to get those trophies?  Wife feels that husband should get dressed well when they go to some party so that the "crowd" may appreciate her husband, and she feels good to have a "trophy husband". The husband invites guests to his home, and the wife cooks delicious food, and the guests appreciate it. Husband feels happy about having a "trophy wife". Children obey the dictates of their parents, and the parents praise everywhere that th...

There are only two types of people who are fully confident. First, young kids . Second, those who have not grown beyond their limited frame of life. Naturally, kids do not have much exposure to life. They are quite convinced that their father is a hero and that he can save them in all situations. They are quite sure of what is good and what is bad. As they get exposure, they grow and understand the limitations of their parents. Their good and bad also undergo significant changes. As we grow, we get to meet different types of people coming from so many different cultures , and our belief systems undergo significant changes. We understand that everything is relative.  What happens thereafter? It is quite uncomfortable for us to live with uncertainty . We just want to be certain. We don't know who created this universe. Since we are not comfortable with uncertainty, we start believing something. In the course of time, our mind forgets that it is our belief system and becomes so certai...

Why do people refuse to grow in a country where Krishna , Mahatma Gandhi , Sri Aurobindo , Buddha , J. Krishnamurti , Kabira , and so many great personalities were born? There is a discussion on one or the other personality in each home. We learn about these people through our textbooks, and yet we grow as self-centered human beings operating within a very limited frame of life. Why do we refuse to grow as human beings? Observation reveals that there are three reasons for not growing. First, "intoxication of pleasure", Second, "laziness to act", and Third, "loss of awareness of the larger picture of life". Most people get intoxicated for pleasure. In today's world, the means of pleasure and entertainment are available in abundance. We can watch YouTube videos and movies on the OTT platform almost all day long. Social media is at our fingertips. The departmental stores are full of products of many types. Zomato is ready to serve the food at our doo...

We are unconcerned about so many things around, just to have that peace of mind. At the same time, we feel responsible for a few things. We are unconcerned about the children who are struggling to find good education and guidance, but feel responsible for the ones we have given birth to. Slowly, that attitude of non-concern turns into insensitivity. Insensitivity leads to exploitative tendencies. These exploitative tendencies give birth to wars and revolutions. If we notice carefully, it will be the same set of people who feel excessively responsible towards a few, who are unconcerned about the "others". The reason is quite clear. It is all about our understanding of the self. "Who am I?". If "I" am quite convinced that "I" am limited to the body, I dwell in, "I" would be unconcerned about anybody else except the "give and take" relationships where there is an exchange of attention and efforts. If "I" am quite convin...

 To what extent are we responsible? We observe that the child is in a self-harming state and refuses to listen. To what extent is our responsibility as a parent? We see that a friend is refusing to grow and heading towards a life crisis. To what extent will we make an effort to help him understand? We see that people in the organization are harming the organization for their self-interest and refuse to listen. To what extent should we fight for the same? We see that people enter a self-suffering loop due to ignorance. They do not invest in their skill-building, and due to a lack of skills, both technical and emotional intelligence, they feel insecure and suffer almost the whole of their lives. To what extent are we responsible? "Responsibility" is a very outcome-oriented work. We feel responsible for a good life for the child, a crisis-free life for a friend, a systemic and efficient organization, and a secure and fearless society. When we feel responsible, our focus shifts t...

The same incident appears quite different as we grow and move on to a wider frame of life. In our struggling phase, we compete with our friends and classmates for the first position. "Winning" is quite tempting. We often hesitate to share our notes. I hope everybody remembers that scene from the movie 3 idiots where Rancho comes first in the examination and his friends feel sad. The following is the link to that scene: https://youtu.be/SFOFAfagwTU?si=L7eVtx6_lfbgLLCP Why are Raju and Farhan sad? Had "Silencer" come first, had they been equally sad? No, definitely not. They never have "Silencer" in their frame of competition. We compete with the people we live with. Our competition is not with the billionaires. They are out of our frame, and we set our targets within that narrow frame.  What happens when Raju meets with an accident? He grows to realize that life has a larger meaning. Once his frame of life grows, he no longer sets his target on "packag...

Today, we celebrate Friendship Day. I feel that friendship is at the core of every good relationship, and without friendship, any and every relationship is quite meaningless. When I think of my friends, what is the first thing that comes to my mind? Freedom of expression. When I talk to friends, I feel free to express my feelings. None is sitting in the seat of judgement, analysing whatever we say through the lenses of social validation. There is unfiltered listening and unfiltered response. Friends do not mince words while showing us their face. Friends do not censor their words while talking.  There is integrity in the relationship. This relation, unlike other relationships, is not imposed on us. We choose our friends. Unlike other relationships, there is a defined responsibility, and yet friendship requires absolute integrity. The moment there is the slightest mixture of expectations or inauthenticity, the beauty of the relationship is lost. I feel that a true friendship is alwa...

Yesterday, my daughter had a very passionate discussion with my friend, who had come home. She has an interest in hand knitting and was trying to prove that it can be a profitable venture. She was quite vocal and argued quite vehemently. In the evening, I just sat with her and discussed for some time. I asked her what she gained by proving that hand knitting is the best option for earning a livelihood. I asked her whether she had tried to know the perspective of a person who has seen business in his family and has 20 years of experience in the office, and has met almost all kinds of people. I questioned her whether, in a hurry to prove our point, we miss all the potential learning. She understood immediately.  We all know very little. Knowing little is not a problem. Rather, the problem is refusing to learn more. We refuse to learn more for two reasons. First, we are not willing to put in the hard work required to know. Second, we don't know the value of learning. I know many of my...

Life is full of diverse experiences. When we look through the window and see the growing trees and birds chirping sitting thereon, we feel connected to the birds and trees. Sometimes I feel that the trees must be the most evolved beings who just keep giving to the world without ever stopping, even for a moment. They survive even when we exploit them and deliberately damage them just because of their selfless drive to give. They have so much patience.  Wind blows, and the leaves of the tree start dancing and start making food again for feeding all the beings on this Earth. Some human beings will take credit for feeding human beings because he is distributing food through some NGO, some will take credit for producing the crop, some will take credit for cooking the food, and some will take credit for processing and packaging the food. The trees and plants are working non-stop without any credit. The leaves are dancing with the wind and making the food, as if they are singing the song ...

It's quite interesting to go a little deeper into our thoughts and intentions to understand "where are we coming from". When we have sympathy with a beggar and give him a note of ten rupees, where are we coming from? Do we feel "guilty" after seeing that beggar? We are having money while so many are dying of hunger, and just want to get rid of that guilt by paying that note to him? Or we have a deep desire for recognition as a "good human being," and we donate to get that recognition in the eyes of the people with us. Or are we deprived of the "respect" and when we give that ten-rupee note to the beggar, do we get that "reward" in the eyes of that beggar? If he refuses to take, and we can watch our reactions, that will reveal the truth about ourselves. Often, that does not happen in our lives, and we live under an illusion of being compassionate. Even if there are one or more such instances, we conveniently ignore them because knowi...

People like Kabira and Buddha will try to give till their last breath to society, while there are many billionaires who can do anything for money. We have people like Dadhichi who will give his bones to Indra for saving the world. On the other hand, there are people like Hitler who can kill millions of people just because of their madness. People like Bhagat Singh will give their lives for love and freedom, while on the other hand, some people will throw acids on the girls, they are not able to grab. Where does this grabbing mentality come from? From deep insecurities within? Yes. But why would these billionaires feel insecure? Why would Hitler feel insecure? Because they never contemplated the meaning of life, and made a winning formula to handle their insecurities. Winning formula in the form of money, power, or a relationship. However, as we are well aware, everything in this world is fleeting. The more people accumulate, the more they become aware that all their possessions are fra...

There was an advertisement, "Ye Dil Mange More," wherein the hero has an insatiable desire for the cold drink. Of course, the company wants to promote its product by superimposing the image of the hero on its product. But whenever I get to meet the entitled people who have almost everything in life and see their insatiable thirst for more and more, I do remember the advertisement. I often get surprised to see their lack of gratitude for what they have and their immense capacity to crib.  What happens when a king attacks the weaker kingdoms to expand the boundaries of his kingdom? He feels entitled to have more. He feels that it is his right to do so. Duryodhana did not want to give even five villages to the Pandavas. Ravana kidnapped Sita. Bali took away all the rights of Sugriva and threw him out of the kingdom. Kaikeyi not only snatched the crown from Rama but also threw him out. I feel that the worst thing that can happen to a human being is that they get something that th...

We all have unique experiences in life. The country in which we are born and brought up, the culture, society, parents, friends, relatives, and, on top of it all, our own life journey, make us what we are. Change any of these factors, and we will be different. Suppose a child is born in China rather than India, he will be different. If we were born into a different family, we would be quite different. Thus, our thought process and our personality are just a product of all these factors.  We identify so strongly with our personality and thought process that we don't take time to judge others without realizing that the mind that is sitting in the "seat of judgement" is also a product of its circumstances. I was born and brought up in a family of vegetarians and used to judge the people taking non-vegetarian food till I reached NADT, where I found people from all the regions and religions, and when I mingled with them, I realized that food habits are largely dependent upon r...

Man is a child of his destiny. Nothing is in our hands. We just live our destiny. We hear all these words and often get confused about whether everything is predetermined and why we work so hard. We should leave everything to fate, sit back, and relax. Yet people make choices almost every moment. Do we use our faith in fate as a tool to calm down our minds? There is no doubt that it has utility, but I am not sure whether it is supported by reality. If everything is destined, that means the entire theory of evolution is wrong. I have studied Astrology and carried out quite extensive research on almost all the division charts of at least a few hundred known people. My understanding is that the 9 planets in Astrology represent the 9 forces of nature. Astrological prediction is like weather prediction by the meteorological department. The horoscope of a person can tell how these 9 forces will be acting inside. Based on that, certain probabilities may be computed. For example, if the Lagna ...