Life

Awareness should be the norm in this society. Then why, on the contrary, is there widespread unawareness? When the whole of society is unaware, it becomes quite normal to fall into the trap of unawareness. Especially when our interaction with the rest of the world is limited. Every religion has its own concept of God, and all these concepts co-exist. These concepts are quite contradictory. While the God of one religion may have a form, the God of the other religion may not have a form. While one religion may believe in the rebirth, the other does not. Ideally, there should be a dialogue across religions to find out the reality. But we hold our beliefs so tightly that any effort to examine the same is quite painful to us.  We want to avoid pain at any cost and have more and more pleasure. We have been told since our childhood that maximization of pleasure and minimization of pain is the purpose of life, and we have accepted that maxim without ever being aware of the meaning of pain ...

I feel big social gatherings to be quite a waste of time as well as resources. People come together and spend so much money on unnecessary dresses. Dresses that are quite expensive and at the same time not even comfortable to wear. We spend lakhs to buy these dresses. We spend lakhs of rupees on food. So much food gets wasted at every function. While so many people suffer from poverty and deprivation of food, does it make sense to waste so much food? On top of it, there is no real interaction in these functions. Most people are busy running here and there. Even if people sit together and want to discuss, there is hardly any scope for the same due to the loud music. I really don't understand why people glorify these functions so much and waste their hard-earned money on these functions. When a boy and a girl are starting their new life, is there anybody who would discuss with them about the meaning of a relationship, responsibility, and the meaning of life? The kids are too busy com...

 I watched the movie Swades again yesterday. The movie is really magical. Mohan, a scientist at NASA, visits a village named Charanpur in India to bring Kaveri Maa with him. In the process, he comes into contact with the villagers and their problems. Slowly and gradually, he gets so connected to the "pain" of the villagers that he comes back to the village and starts working for the villagers. He is quite convinced that life in that village is not worth living, and therefore has no doubt in his mind about returning to NASA. What happens in the process? When Mohan comes into contact with the people, he feels their pain. Generally, we stay in our island of "I" and hardly ever allow anybody to enter that "I" or venture out of that island to enter into another island. We feel safe on that island. Entering the water is too risky. This fear makes us reject. We look at a beggar on the street, the rickshaw puller on the street, a young boy selling ballpens at the ...

Pain is our greatest teacher. When we undergo pain, we either try to ignore the pain or find a solution. We have a headache and take a painkiller or divert our mind to something else so that the body can heal itself. When we experience a feeling of separation, we either make an effort to meet that person or divert our mind to the work at hand. When we have a pain due to the loss of a relationship, we form another relationship or divert our mind towards some other thoughts. We can try to divert our minds to something else if we are in control of our attention. That can happen in cases where the source of pain is something that is not at the core of our existence. When we have options and we can fill the vacuum with something else. Pain of handling poor working conditions can be replaced by thoughts about the smiles of kids at home. Pain of a tiresome journey may be replaced with the thoughts of a reunion with old friends. However, this formula does not work when the pain is due to the l...

We make choices every day. Our efforts are, for the most part, a result of our choices. For example, we choose comfort and make efforts to acquire a comfortable home. We choose taste and make efforts to prepare tasty food. We choose social interaction and make efforts to organise social gatherings. Do we have a choice in a meditative state? When we witness every sensation, every thought, and do not react, do we still have a choice?  Somebody will say that Buddha is in a state of enlightenment, and therefore, he should not have a choice. Does that mean Buddha will now join the army and start attacking the other kingdom? Does that mean that Buddha will now start participating in the social gossip? Does that mean that Buddha will start participating in office politics? Does that mean that Buddha will now be in a vegetative state, and anybody can come and waste his time? No. Not at all. On the contrary, Buddha will no longer be in a people-pleasing mode. We please people and participat...

There are layers and layers of our being. Very few relationships are based on the connection of the core. Most relationships are based on the attraction of the outer layers. We feel insecure and see somebody wielding a lot of power. We get attracted to that person and fall in love. We feel "lonely" and see somebody taking an interest in us and get attracted to that person, and fall in love. We feel rejected and find somebody who appreciates us and develops affection towards that person, and fall in love. We have very low self-esteem because of constant criticism and insults by society, and meet somebody who holds us in high esteem, and we fall in love. We feel the pain of poverty and find somebody rich, who is interested in us, and fall in love with that person. We get inspired by somebody's ideology and fall in love. We get inspired by the thoughts of someone and fall in love.  What is the nature of all these phenomena? Is it love? Is it attachment? I think these are nei...

 Fear is a powerful motivation. It brings urgency to act. Suppose while writing this post, the building starts shaking due to an earthquake, I will leave writing the post and run quickly to a safe place. Different fears shape our lives in an insecure society. Fear of not getting a job makes many students study harder. Fear of societal approval makes us follow the norms of society. Fear of diseases makes us get health and life insurance. Fear of an uncertain future makes us save money for the future. Fear of being lonely makes us invest time and energy in relationships. Whatever fear drives our lives, isn't it a zero-sum game at the end of the day? If the entire struggle is for avoiding health crises and getting treatment for different diseases, death is the eternal reality, and at the end of life, we are going to encounter the same fear. Whatever relationships we form, at the end of the day, we will be lonely. Whatever social approvals we acquire, everybody is alone inside, and the...

Relationships may be magical, as well as the greatest cause of our sufferings. There are various types of relationships, including the parent-child relationship, the husband-wife relationship, the relationship between friends, the relationship between colleagues, and the boss-subordinate relationship. We all have relationships. What is the reason that some of these relationships are so enjoyable, while others are a great cause of suffering? All those relationships that are shadowed by complexes become painful. Superiority and inferiority complexes make relationships painful.  There may be broadly four types of relationships. First, "I know, you don't know". In these relationships, we presume that we know and the other person does not know. Since we have a better exposure to life, we compare ourselves with the other person and start making the other person feel that he does not know. We keep pointing out the mistakes in the other person. This type is quite common in parent...

 Today, I visited a residential school to interact with the 10th-grade students. It was wonderful listening to them and interacting with them. I was once again concerned after listening to the same old fear. Fear of parental disapproval. Do we realize what we do to our kids in the process? How much burden do we place on their shoulders? I asked the children whether their friendship is based on judgment. Would they break their friendship if their friend gets bad marks or chooses a different career? They said no. I asked them then why their relationships with their parents would suffer if they get low marks or choose a career that they do not like. Children answered that parents are their well-wishers. Are parents really? It's time for the parents to introspect. Children feel so burdened and want to repay the debts of parenting by getting good marks in the examination and by choosing a career that their parents want for them. In fact, few kids said that they will decide on their care...

 Krishna is often quoted for his words in the Bhagwat Geeta that we should do our work without worrying about the result. We often do not realize the great teaching behind this simple statement. Why is our every action in life tagged to one or the other result? We study to get a job, marry to find life, bring up kids so that they may take care of us, form friendships to seek the company of like-minded people, seek positions to get power, and even seek spirituality to get enlightenment or moksha. We constantly seek because we are not "aware" of what we are. Krishna is aware of who he is, and therefore, he does not seek. He acts. He explores possibilities.  Whenever we lose awareness of who we are, we will be fearful and insecure. We will become desperate to "become" somebody who looks "secure". This cruel and stupid society makes a child insecure. Unless you prove yourself to be a good student in the class and get the number one position in the class, you a...

Are the most powerful people in this world less fearful? Not at all. In fact, they are more afraid than ordinary human beings. Fear is like seepage; we may try to paint it, plaster it, cover it with the plastic sheets, or POP, or with the best of the material available in the market, seepage will continue until we repair the source of seepage. We may become the most powerful or wealthy, may develop the best social image, may subscribe to any belief system, may have a huge fan following, yet we will remain fearful unless we repair the source of fear. The source of seepage is not a lack of a coating of paint, or POP, or that plastic sheet on the wall. It's the constant supply of water from a leaking pipeline. The problem is not with water, but rather the problem is with its leakage. Life energy is flowing in our body. It helps us pay attention and concentrate. It is our lifeline, and we will not be able to survive without this energy even for a moment. The problem is not with this li...

Such a vast cosmos, with the known universe comprising hundreds of billions of galaxies, and each galaxy comprising hundreds of billions of stars, and we are stuck on Earth. The reality of Mars or Jupiter would be quite different. When we move away from the solar system to a different star, the reality undergoes a significant change. The concept of "time" changes completely. Even on Earth, when we move from one place to another other our perception of reality undergoes a significant change. Yet, we get stuck in the place where we are. What about thoughts? Thoughts are just like the clouds in the sky. Our brain has around 100 billion neurons with around 100 trillion connections. When we think, many neural connections get activated simultaneously, and there are infinite combinations and permutations, with each combination being unique. That's why no experiment can be repeated. Even if we visit the same place for the second time, our experience will be different. Our percept...

 Can a fearful mind have love and compassion? Most people would say yes. We have fear because we love our families. Therefore, we are afraid for our family members. children, their security, and their future. Is it true? We just need to introspect. What is love and compassion? Love and compassion are feelings of being connected. Where is that feeling of "being connected" coming from? This question is quite crucial. Is that feeling coming from a deep fear of being lonely and vulnerable? Can we see now that it's just the opposite? We don't fear because we love our family, friends, and relatives; rather, we "love" them because we are afraid of loneliness. We feel fragile when we are lonely.  When we "love" somebody because we want to cling to that person due to the fear of being lonely, we would like to keep that person safe, take care of that person, and also make them comfortable. But we will do all these things with an expectation of reciprocation....

When Buddha talks about the middle path, does that mean control? Does that mean balancing? Control is quite stressful, and balance is quite difficult. How would a person be at ease and maintain equanimity while he is doing something stressful and difficult? After all, equanimity is at the core of the teachings of Buddha.  When we drive a car on the highway, driving the car too slowly is difficult because the cars behind will blow their horns and will not let us drive slowly. Similarly, if we drive a car too fast, that will be quite dangerous and we will be prone to accidents. It is effortless to drive a car at nearly the speed limit. That's natural. That does not require balancing or control. Similarly, when we have to complete an assignment, by being too slow and lazy, we will not be able to complete the task and waste our precious energy. Similarly, by being too desperate, we will become anxious, and then anxiety will take over, and we will again not be able to complete the task....

Our brains are conditioned from childhood to draw conclusions. We observe a food item and quickly conclude whether it is tasty or not. We encounter a person and quickly conclude whether he is good or not. We undergo some experience and quickly conclude whether that experience was good or bad. Our brain constantly categorizes everything into good or bad, right or wrong, depending on our conditioning. We are in such a hurry because we have defined the purpose of life in terms of certain achievements, and any and everything that supports those achievements is good, and the rest are bad.  When conclusions become primary, observation becomes secondary. We are always in a hurry to conclude and therefore miss the most crucial part of the observation. Why Ravana is not able to listen to Vibhishana is because his mind has already concluded that he is not going to let go of Sita. His mind wants to possess Sita at any cost. That's why his mind just closes down on any advice to let go of Sita....