Life

I am truly amazed at the level of stupidity among the most "intelligent" people. Ordinary people are in a state of self-doubt because they are not sure of themselves. The "intelligent" people are quite certain of what they do. That's why there is no looking back. No re-examination. They have thousands of logic to justify their stupidity. It is difficult to convince them through arguments. Their logic and conviction are their winning formula to win the race. Different people use different modes of transport to reach their destination. Somebody walks slowly, somebody runs, somebody rides a bicycle, somebody rides a bike, somebody has a car, somebody has a sports car, somebody travels by train, somebody by flight. They may take different times to reach the destination depending on the speed of the mode of transport. If we set a wrong destination, the faster the mode of transport, the farther we will be from our real destination. That's precisely the problem wit...

Watched the movie "Sitaren Jameen Par". It is a movie made about special children and their coach. While the coach gets initially quite upset with the kids because they take a lot of time to understand. Yet, slowly and gradually, they gel well. In fact, the coach gets a life lesson from the children that life is not about winning, but rather it is about living. Children suffering from Down syndrome and many other mental disorders accept their limitations easily. They learn to adjust and live life, but the "normal" human beings find difficulties in accepting their experiences and keep running away from their fears the whole of their lives. Why do we always have to prove that we are the best? Why do we always have to win? Isn't the deep desire to be number one also emanating from the same insecure and fearful mind? Why would a loving and compassionate human being be concerned about winning or losing? Individuals are just a reflection of society. A society where ex...

 Equanimity is the key to the spiritual journey. Equanimity means that we do not react and remain at peace even in adverse circumstances. Equanimity can't be forced. It's a natural state of being for aware people. As we become aware of our inner self, we realize that this body and all the sensations in different parts of it are temporary. When there is a flow of testosterone and we feel excited, angry, or agitated; or when there is a flow of dompamine and we feel at the top of the world, after winning some medal, award, or experiencing some achievement; or when there is a flow of serotonin and we feel wider, connected, in all these situations, the "self" remains unchanged. What changes is the flow of hormones and neurotransmitters that create certain sensations in different parts of the body and create certain experiences.  Does that mean that we will no longer be concerned about anybody? If there is a rape in front of our eyes and we will maintain equanimity consider...

Comparison is quite natural to human beings. We compare ourselves with our colleagues. If we have worse circumstances than our colleagues, we feel bad. We compare our kids with the kids of our friends and colleagues. Organizations compare their employees. Boards compare the students and grade them. We even compare our friends and relatives, and often give examples that so-and-so relative is better or worse than the others. We also compare our kids and often say that one is better than the other. But why do we compare? While the whole world is busy comparing, there are lots of talks that spiritual organizations do about compassion. Compassion means concern and a willingness to help others. Can comparison and compassion co-exist? While the whole world is busy comparing itself with others, can we have compassion? Think of a child who is one of the toppers and busy comparing himself with his competitor. He may not show his notes to his competitor, but at the same time, if he has a weak stu...

Words are often deceiving. There are layers and layers of feelings, and we use word that suits us. For example, the word "responsibility" is often used by us to justify our present course of action. We do not take the time out to understand the nature of life, because we are busy with our jobs and families. Why are we busy? Because we have responsibilities for kids, family members, and sometimes relatives. What does the word "responsibility" signify? We just need to examine the genesis of this feeling. There may be a situation where we feel concerned about the kids and we know that they are vulnerable in this cruel world and therefore want to make them stronger, making them available the best education. Or we want to accumulate money for them so that they do not need to work hard. Or we want to buy them a flat so that they have some place to live. Or we want to set up a business for them so that they do not have to go through the same struggle as we did. What is the...

I don't know whether the human mind can truly comprehend feelings like love and compassion. An insecure mind gets programmed by society to follow the majority view. It looks safe to believe in what most people say. This "safe option" takes very deep roots in our minds. We look for validation of our actions and views, and that's why we are absolutely certain, the moment our views and actions are validated by our friends and relatives. We choose the most popular (and therefore most competitive) streams of education, career options, and jobs. We choose to marry because almost everybody in society tells us to marry. Even while choosing a life partner, we go by popular criteria.  Actually, we are never sure of what we want. Understanding what we want requires listening to our "heart". Not so that we do not have examples of the people who followed their hearts. We have thousands of examples who listened to their heart. In fact, all our mythological heroes listened...

Who will understand the pain of Buddha? His father wanted him to enjoy the best of the world. He offered to arrange best of the comforts available in this world for him. The more he insisted on those comforts and the more Buddha was in pain. His father was offering the best he could have offered and yet every such offer would end up increasing the pain of Buddha. It was beyond the capacity of his father to understand the mind of Buddha. Buddha experienced that deep love and compassion, how can he remain confined to an island. Father was happy creating an island for his son where everything under the sun was available. However, the son has two fundamental questions in his mind. First, are these comforts permanent or temporary. Second, whatever is permanent whether the same is available to everybody or not. His self can’t be confined to an island.  A person living on island would never be able to appreciate this feeling. He is living in a picture perfect world. Unless somebody experi...

The recent news of the aircraft crash in Ahmedabad made all of us cry and worried. Still, almost all the flights took off and landed after the incident. Many of us would have travelled by air after that incident. We read and listen to news about train derailments and road accidents, yet we still travel by train and car. We see the death of near and dear ones, and yet remain so sure that we will be alive and make plans for the future. Is that faith or hallucination? If it is faith, where does that faith come from?  Probably both things co-exist. All of us know that death is a reality, and all of us have a limited time to spend on this Earth. Yet, we live life as if we exist for perpetuity. "Death" is such a hard problem that we do not want to spend time solving that, to know about life and death. We know that many people have tried for eternity to find answers to this, and most people could not find an answer. So, we try to find an easy solution. We just ignore the question an...

Does love mean a "blind yes" to each and every desire of the deloved? If we love our kids, do we fulfill all of their demands? Does love mean imposing our worldview and wishlist on the other? Would a parent impose their likes and dislikes on the kids and call that love? There is a lot of manipulation in the name of love from both sides. Because, often, an insecurity-driven arrangement is considered tantamount to love. Unless we appreciate the true meaning of love, we will continue to either exploit or be exploited in the name of love. Do we love? We have two categories of relationships in this world. First, transactional relationships. You scratch my back and I scratch yours. There are constant expectations and calculations in such relationships. Most relationships in the office and society are like that. Second, relationships based on love and concern. Where we feel connected at the core and have a real concern.  We are all products of our own societies and parenting. We enc...

To know the reality, we need to break free from our beliefs and imagination. We form an image of different people in our minds when we hear about them from our friends and colleagues, and actually, when we interact with them, we find them to be quite different people. If we do not interact with those people, we will live with their images all throughout our lives. Similarly, with have formed an image of God in our mind based on the stories told to us since childhood. But is that reality?  Knowing something requires effort, while believing is effortless. We chose an easy option without realizing the huge cost we would have to pay for that. It's easy to believe that we are never going to die. It makes us relaxed, but we have to pay a huge cost. We lose that sense of urgency to use life as an opportunity and become lazy. We develop a habit of deferring the work at hand till tomorrow, a tomorrow that never comes and leaves us to repent when we are on our deathbed. Similarly, we create ...

Each one of us wants to break free from the routine we are trapped in. We get up in the morning with a single thought to go to the office and finish the pending work. We arrive in the evening feeling tired after a long day of meetings. Work doesn't stop even after office hours, and the horror tune of WhatsApp messages keeps ringing throughout evenings. We want to run away from this madness, but are chased by the deafening sounds of "responsibilities" that we can not ignore. This "world" has learnt the management tricks of "carrot and stick," and when we feel too exhausted, we are offered some carrots in the form of a quick dose of adrenaline or dopamine in the form of some sensual pleasure. Some pleasure tour for a change, or some outing with friends to know that everybody is equally suffering and we are not alone in the suffering, or some honor or award that makes us feel elevated and different from the rest, all giving a spike of pleasure that disapp...

I had long discussions with a few friends around the word "concern". The word "concern" was echoing in my ears throughout the time while on my way back home. We are concerned about family and friends. We want to be available to them at the time when they need us the most. Is our "concern" limited to family and friends? What about relatives, our colleagues, other members of the society, the country, and even animals? Is our concern "graded," that makes us more concerned about a few and less concerned about others? I feel that we need to ask more explicit questions about the genesis of this "concern". Why are we concerned about anybody? Is it because we have got used to the presence of somebody in our lives, and when that person goes missing, we will not be able to tolerate that vacuum, and that thought makes us uncomfortable? Or is that concern due to our dependence on that person? Or is that concern due to fear of being alone? Can we se...

When Ram decided to leave Ayodhya to honor his father's words, was there a thought about Sita? He was newly married, and Sita would have been left alone. When Sita decided to accompany her husband to the forest, had she given a thought about her safety in the forest? When Krishna decided to leave Brij, did he think about Radha and his friends? When Mahatma Gandhi decided to leave his job and fight for freedom, did he think about his family?  Conflicts are part and parcel of our lives. How do we make decisions while facing these conflicts? Conflict between the comforts of home and the temptation of a good education in a university abroad, conflict between the security of the present job and pursuing our passion, conflict between continuing a relationship that's not working, and dropping the same and moving ahead, conflict between eating tempting food that gives immediate pleasure, and helthy food that makes us feel better after some time, or conflict between listening to what so...

If we look around the world to analyze some of the poorest and most powerless people and some of the richest and most powerful, we would instantly be able to see that while for the poor, need is limited to food and shelter, for the rich, need has expanded beyond imagination. He feels that he needs air conditioning even in the toilet. A palatial house also does not satiate his need, and he needs a home at a hill station to rest, and a house in different parts of the country where he wants to spend his vacation. The most expensive watches and clothes are his needs. He needs cars worth crores of rupees to travel, and a private jet becomes essential to save time.  Any and everything may be justified in the name of need. But can we observe what is happening in the process? Every time we justify some "greed" in the name of "need", we sell our freedom cheap. How? The moment we set our target on buying an Audi or a Mercedes, or a flat in a posh locality, that means we have ...

Love is probably one of the most abused words in this world. Some people love their country and sacrifice their lives for it. Some people love fish and kill them for their love. Some people throw acid on the face of their beloved when she refuses to acknowledge their one-sided love. The word "love" has been used to express such a wide range of emotions that we often get confused. To understand what "love" really means, we probably need to examine ourselves. Suppose we "love" our kids or our parents, what does it mean? We need to examine the interplay of "love" and "fear". During the COVID-19 pandemic, people who died of COVID-19 were isolated, and many people died in hospitals and in isolation at home. This was one of the best times to understand the true meaning of love. Can a "fearful" person dare to help a COVID-19 patient who is dying due to a lack of oxygen? Would he have the courage to take care of the patient who can no...

Right from getting up in the morning to falling into bed fully tired, everything is fully packed. We follow a similar routine almost every day. I don't really understand why. This Earth, which could have been such a beautiful place, has turned into a treadmill where everybody is running aimlessly. It's like a production line where everybody enters as a raw material, "educated" by schools and colleges, "conditioned" by society and parents to follow the norms and belief systems of society, "frightened" by insensitivity and uncertainty all around, "motivated" to accumulate the resources to allay fears, and to ensure that nobody revolts, "primed" with certain sensula pleasures.  There are three fundamental pillars of this structure: fear, belief, and pleasure. Society inflicts fear in the minds of kids from a very early age. If you do not study, you will be a failure. If you do not listen to your parents and elders, you will commit ...

Most people often reject spirituality, stating that if we become desireless, there will be no motivation left in life. Generally, we get motivated to work because of our desire to earn money or the power to obtain the comforts and pleasures we like. If desires are gone, what will we work hard for? We will become dull and lifeless. I think that's a valid observation and appears to be quite true on the surface. People work for money because they need it to fulfill their desires for comfort. People also work for appreciation because appreciation enhances their self-image, which is very dear to people. People also work for power because power makes people feel that they are in control of things, and therefore, they feel secure. People also work for their beliefs because these beliefs form the foundation of their existence. People work for their relatives and friends because they are an extension of their selves. Now, if people drop their desire for money, power, social validation, beli...

I often wonder while millions of us pray to he idol of Krishna, when Krishna was actually alive, many of the contemporary kings insulted him. In fact, Duryodhana tried to imprison him. When Buddha was alive, many people hated him and even tried to kill him. The same was the fate of Jesus. Then why do people pray for these people after they leave this world? Are there no Jesus, Buddha, or Krishna in today's world? What is their fate? Are they being appreciated? Most people having attributes like Jesus, Krishna, and Buddha are not appreciated by contemporary society because they want us to change, and we do not want to change. We want them to bless us with what we wish. That's the sole use case of God in our lives. When God asks us to change, we reject such a God. We want a God who can listen to all our prayers, even if our prayers are self-defeating.  We want comforts, fun, and pleasure, and we try to negotiate the same every time we pray. God, you are so good, I will sing your ...

 In Vipassana, we observe sensations in different parts of our bodies. There are always sensations in different parts of the body, whether we are aware of them or not. Even when we are not practicing Vipassana, we occasionally feel them. For example, we feel heat when it is extremely hot, we sweat, we feel strange sensations in our stomach when we are ill-prepared for a crucial meeting or examination, and we feel heat when we get extremely angry. Through these sensations, the mind communicates with the body and vice versa. Our thoughts activate the secretion of different hormones, which result in changes in the functioning of internal organs, which are experienced by us in the form of sensations in different parts of the body.  However, the body too is a storehouse of unconscious memories. When it experiences similar sensations again, the old memories get triggered, and the body starts sending signals to the brain. For example, had we had a free fall in a lift and felt extreme...

It's not easy to realize our own fixations. How can a fixated mind be "aware" of its own fixations? While in a car, we can notice the movement of other vehicles, but it is difficult to notice the movement of the vehicle we are riding in. That's how we can easily notice where others are fixated, but it is difficult to notice our own fixation. Somebody is excessively worried about the settlement of his kids, or his career progression, health, disputes of properties, or a divorce case. We can see his fixation and, at times, advise our friends and relatives facing similar issues quite magnanimously. On the other hand, when we face similar issues, the trouble appears quite real and we don't want "free ki advice" from anybody. Similarly, when somebody is stuck with a belief system that appears quite stupid, but when we are stuck with our belief system, that appears quite real. Why do our brains create this hallucination? Probably, the brain wants to be certain...