Watched the movie "Sitaren Jameen Par". It is a movie made about special children and their coach. While the coach gets initially quite upset with the kids because they take a lot of time to understand. Yet, slowly and gradually, they gel well. In fact, the coach gets a life lesson from the children that life is not about winning, but rather it is about living. Children suffering from Down syndrome and many other mental disorders accept their limitations easily. They learn to adjust and live life, but the "normal" human beings find difficulties in accepting their experiences and keep running away from their fears the whole of their lives.
Why do we always have to prove that we are the best? Why do we always have to win? Isn't the deep desire to be number one also emanating from the same insecure and fearful mind? Why would a loving and compassionate human being be concerned about winning or losing? Individuals are just a reflection of society. A society where exploitation and chaos are the norm makes everybody insecure. Insecurities get hard-wired in the individual brains, and that's why people keep running the race even after getting what they aimed for. People get into the best of the services, and there too, they compete with their colleagues and even play dirty tricks to pull them down.
If a child starts competing from his early age, his drive to come first gets hard-wired. He instinctively participates in every race and wants to prove that he is the best. Winning every race gives him a dose of dopamine, and since he is so disconnected with his inner self that such a small dose of dopamine is life-saving for him. After getting that small dose of dopamine, he again becomes restless to get a higher dose of dopamine, and again starts running the race. In the process, he loses whatever little connection is left with the inner self.
An alcohol addict gets addicted to alcohol. Each time he gets the alcohol, he gets a feeling of high. But soon that "nice" feeling gets over, and he suffers a hangover and takes medicines to get rid of that. His brain can't accept that "missing" pleasure. Some people start taking more and more of liquor, morning and evening. Some people crave those "parties" where they can have "fun". Aren't we also doing the same thing in the name of obsession with winning? We become desperate to win because winning gives us dopamine. We feel good about that. The moment we win one race, we set the target at winning a new race. After each win, we feel good for some time and then get back to the same feeling of hollowness. We fail to realize that we have become addicted to the dopamine that is released in our bodies after each win. Slowly and gradually, we compete everywhere, including in our relations.
We want to become the best husbands, wives, sons, daughters, and fathers. and mothers. We forget to live in the process. Living is possible only when we explore. Exploration is possible only when we are free. Free from our fears and insecurities. That freedom is not possible through the acquisition of any worldly means. That freedom is possible only when we realize the truth. The truth about who we are. Since we are always preoccupied with the race, there is hardly any time available with us to know who we are. Therefore, the starting point of "living life" is to understand "who am I".
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