When we talk about responsibility, what do we mean? When we say Lord Ram was very responsible, what do we mean? When a parent complains that his child is not responsible, what does it mean? As I understand it, responsibility means the ability to respond. The ability to respond to a person or a situation has three essential requisites. First, the ability to listen. I can not take the responsibility to treat a patient suffering from cancer because I have not done the requisite studies in medical science, and therefore I have no capacity to listen to the needs of the patient. Second, I should have the capacity to respond. A doctor may be able to listen and understand the problem, but if he is not practising as a doctor, he can't help the patient. Third, the willingness to listen. I may be a doctor working in a hospital, yet still not be willing to help the patient.
But why would somebody take responsibility for another person? Why does the doctor take responsibility? A doctor may take responsibility for a patient for two reasons. First, he wants to earn money. Second, he has love and compassion. We take responsibility at work because promotions are linked to performance. We take responsibility for relatives because we want social validation. Ego wants to achieve something, and that achievement requires responsibility; that's why we take it. In such situations, the ego takes on the pain and discomfort that come with responsibility out of greed. It wants to achieve something, so it doesn't shy away from taking responsibility.
In such situations, we work on our capacity to listen, our capacity to respond, and our willingness to respond. However, all three require effort, and the ego will always calculate whether the pain and effort of being responsible outweigh the commensurate gain. Though the calculations aren't easy, the mind keeps calculating. As long as the drive to become outweighs the pain and effort of taking responsibility, we will keep taking responsibility. Bhishma took responsibility for Hastinapur because he wanted to be a person who stood true to his word throughout his life. Karma took responsibility because he wanted revenge on the Pandavas and to prove he was the best warrior. Bhima took responsibility for fighting the battle because he wanted to take revenge. This kind of responsibility-taking can make a person very successful, yet at the end of the day, he may become more egoistic than before. Because his sense of responsibility is driven by ego and its drive to become. Of course, this can help someone break free from laziness and comfort, but Ravan was also hardworking and took responsibility to avenge his sister; still, ego was at the core of that revenge. He wanted to prove that no one could touch his relatives. He wanted to prove his might to the world. At the same time, he was greedy to marry Sita.
Second, we may take responsibility out of love and compassion. Mahatma Gandhi took responsibility to fight for the country's freedom out of love and compassion. We see so many people around us taking responsibility for the poor people out of love and compassion. Some people start old-age homes because they feel love and compassion for homeless elderly people. When responsibility is driven by love and compassion, one breaks free of the frameworks. We have all watched the movie Dharma, starring Pankaj Kapoor. When he watches a Muslim boy in danger during the religious riots, despite his strong biases against that religion, love and compassion take over, and he shelters and protects the child. He breaks free of the fixed framework of his beliefs.
A person breaks free of a framework, but the ego plays tricks again, and he gets stuck. The human brain has a huge desire to control. It is very insecure, which is why it wants to feel secure by achieving something, holding on to something, or becoming something. That's why, as we break free of a framework, the brain immediately tries to own up the wider framework by claiming ownership of that. That's why people keep breaking free of frameworks, only to get stuck in the ego again. When love and compassion are the locus, no framework can confine us. A great scientist will not settle for anything less than truth, which is infinite. That's why he will take responsibility to discover truth. That's why he will observe every minute detail. A great writer takes responsibility for creating the best piece of writing. When our sense of responsibility centres on truth, love, compassion, and freedom, we keep breaking free of frameworks, one after another.
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