We have a very strong sense of responsibility. A father may not like his job, yet he keeps doing it because he has taken responsibility for earning money for his family. A mother may feel exploited and may even be physically tortured, yet she will stay back because she has assumed the responsibility of taking care of the children. Where does this sense of responsibility come from? Does the Sun have a responsibility to help plants make food or to dry our clothes? Do the clouds have responsibility to bring water to the pond of our village? Do the trees have a responsibility to provide us with oxygen?
Where does this sense of responsibility come from? Why do we feel so responsible for our family, yet easily turn our faces away from responsibility toward society? If we can save a crore to ensure quality education for our kids, why don't we help the kids on the street who do not even have enough to feed themselves? Why is our responsibility towards our kids so strong? Where does that responsibility come from? How can we feel responsible toward a woman after marriage whom we married and hardly knew just a few days back?
Is responsibility a story which this society has created to make the institutions of family work? If our actions are driven by love and compassion, how can that love be selective? Would the Sun provide its sunlight only to a selected few? Would the tree produce oxygen for only a few? Would the clouds bring rainfall only for a few?
Thus, two questions about responsibility arise. First, why do we feel responsible at all? Second, do we have responsibility towards a selected few? I feel the answer to the second question lies in the first. Responsibility may come from the social narrative or love. When it comes from a social narrative, we feel responsible for a selected few whom society has held responsible, such as parents and kids. But why do we go by that? What if I don't buy this concept and do not go by the social narrative and stop feeling responsible for my family? Society will withdraw validation. I would be called an antisocial person who does not obey social norms, and people would not like me. Society will isolate me, and I will be alone.
When my sense of responsibility is driven by the social narrative, and in turn by the desire for social validation, it returns; this concept of responsibility is not based on love. This is just an exchange. Because we want to hear good things about ourselves from the people around us, we do what society expects. On the other hand, when responsibility is based on love, it isn't selective. We feel concerned and responsible towards everybody, the ecosystem, the environment, world peace, and the cleanliness of the city. Love isn't selective. However, that doesn't mean denying love for oneself or close family members. If children are keen to study and want to explore their potential, parents have a responsibility to support their growth, and that comes from love. If I believe the purpose of life is to explore one's potential to the fullest, I would like to explore my own potential and also help everyone around me realise theirs, including the children. But if they are not interested, I would use the money better and spend it on more meaningful purposes. No doubt the river will replenish the water level in the riverbank area first. Then the water will travel to distant places. The riverbanks can’t remain dry while distant areas get water. At the same time, the river's life isn't limited to its banks, and as it grows in size and strength, the banks can't contain it.
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