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Why are we Sad?

 We are so sure of our sorrow. Ask a child who has failed in the Civil Services Prelims. He would be very sad. Ask a businessman failing in business, and he will be very sad. Ask a government servant transferred against his wishes, and he will be sad too. Ask a parent whose child has not been able to get into the college of his choice, and he will be sad, too. What have we lost? A dream shattered? A projection went wrong? We projected that either life would be stable or we would get what we desired. It did not happen our way, and we became sad.

Let's take a simple situation. We go to a social gathering expecting great food. However, the food is not to our taste, and we are unable to fully enjoy it. What will happen? Will we be sad? That will depend upon our locus. If the locus were to have a good discussion with our friends, it would not matter much. However, if the locus were to have a good dinner, we would be disappointed. Locus makes all the difference. Lord Ram is about to become the king of Ayodhya, and in the meantime, his life changes for the next 14 years. He has to go to the forest with his wife and his brother. Does he become sad? No. In 1942, just nine months after his marriage, Viktor Frankl and his family were sent to the Theresienstadt concentration camp. His father died there of starvation and pneumonia. In 1944, Frankl and his surviving relatives were transported to Auschwitz, where his mother and brother were murdered in the gas chambers. His wife, Tilly, died later of typhus in Bergen-Belsen. Frankl spent three years in four concentration camps. After coming from the concentration camp, he wrote a world-famous book, "Man's Search for Meaning". That's such a wonderful book that I read in 2005. He says that one can find meaning even in the worst situations, such as a concentration camp.

Why do we become sad and cynical with a small setback, while Rama remains joyful even in the forest? How Viktor Frankl can find meaning in life even in a concentration camp. It all depends on how we understand the meaning of life. If our meaning of life is limited to acquiring "what we consider to be pleasure", we will keep repeating it throughout our lives. Going to the same parties and functions, eating the same food, and living the same routine. Until things go wrong, and then we will become sad. Like a programmed robot, performing well until it is asked to do routine tasks and failing as soon as there is a change. On the other hand, if the meaning of life is to explore, we will find something or the other to explore.

Strangely, all the people we admire as humanity are the ones who have explored. We admire the scientists who explored the uncharted domain of nature. We admire the artists who do something new, the actors who bring something fresh to the screen. We admire the writers who write something new. Yet, there is something within us that holds us back and makes us sad when we fail to get what we desire. Probably, we do not have the vision to see the opportunities that lie ahead amid disaster. Not so that Rama and Viktor Frankl would have seen it. However, the answer lies in Yog Vashstha. Ram understands the truth of the world and develops "Vairagya". He wants to leave everything. As if an actor playing his role on the stage was under the illusion of being the character, he suddenly realises that it was just a drama and disgustingly wants to leave everything and disappear, and then Sage Vashistha and Vishwamitra tell him that the entire cosmos is like that. Every individual soul is just like a drop of the same ocean, and we are all participating in the "divine play". As the "Tibetan Book of Living and Dying" says, it is not possible to live without understanding the meaning of death. Once we understand that we are the actors playing on the stage, a significant shift takes place within us. We play our role to the best of our capacity without bothering about the role per se. Great actors make even 2 minutes of performance in a movie unforgettable. 

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