The brain's conditioning is so deep that it takes years to feel comfortable with a language other than our mother tongue. That's why, when we travel to a different country, have to speak English all day, and meet an Indian, the first thing we do is speak in our native language. When we come back after touring for a week, the first thing we want to do is have tea with ginger and milk and eat home-cooked food.
We are born and brought up in a society where almost everybody shares common beliefs about life. Different societies have different meanings of life. Family members, relatives, and neighbours pass these meanings on to children, consciously or unconsciously. For example, people of my generation, who were born and brought up in North India, would have heard of all these things: "Padho ge Likho ge to Banoge Nawab, Khelo ge Kudo ge to Bano ge Kharab", such a bad social narrative about sports; "Jaldi se settle ho ja", as if the purpose of life is to get "settled" and then just not to do anything; "Hamara to ek hi beta hai", as if the boy child has to bear the whole of the responsibility, "Bitiya ko to paraye ghar jana hai"; as if the girl child has no parity; "Nang ke muh kaun lage", as if we have to keep our mouth shut and bear all the nonsense of a stupid person who is shameless as well, "maja to sab ke saath aata hai", as if one can't enjoy solitude, "aadhyatm to budhape ki baate hain", as if you try to understand the meaning of life only after wasting the entire life.
Some of these things look very stupid. But when we are born and brought up in a society, we tend to acquire a belief system consciously and unconsciously. Girls with dark complexions naturally become conscious of their looks, because society makes us believe that Kanha too wanted to marry Gauri. "Radhika Gori se, maiya kara do mera byah". Every song, every story, and every conversation strengthens these beliefs. "Sab paise ki maya hai", and the poor child sets a target to become a millionaire.
How can anyone grow past these narratives? Looks quite difficult. I haven't seen people in the same society grow past that. Most people see through a few things, move to a more evolved society or city, come into contact with a more evolved thought process, and then break free of the narrative. Most of our freedom fighters, such as Mahatma Gandhi, Subhash Chandra Bose, Sri Aurobindo, and so many others, were exposed to the culture of freedom when they visited different countries, and that's how they got convinced to fight for freedom.
We identify so strongly with our thought process that it becomes very difficult to see through our belief systems. More so if all the people around us carry the same belief system, it becomes almost impossible to see through, unless we come into contact with something profound: some profound book that may change our lives, or a profound person showing us a very different perspective. But that's rare, and that's why almost all of us remain prisoners of our belief system. But if we are not too lazy, somewhere, someday, we will connect to reality. When we look at the sky, we will naturally think about the cosmos, the stars, and the planets. When we go to a cremation ground, we will think about death. When we go to the hospital, we think about disease; when we read about different civilisations, we think that even civilisations are temporary. If we actually think, rather than thinking within the confines of our belief system, we can break free of our limited frame. Once we come out of the cave, we can't stay inside the cave of our own free will. We will naturally like to be in the open sky. Thinking isn't for people who want comfort. It's only for the daredevils.
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