What is the purpose of a spiritual journey? To seek peace? To seek happiness? Who is seeking peace and happiness? Obviously, somebody who is not at peace or happy. Who is that? But we were not seeking peace and happiness in our childhood. You ask any child what he wants, and I don't think that even a single child will seek happiness or peace. Rather, they will seek chocolate, friends, games, sweets, momos, or burgers. As we grow up, we seek money, power, kids, and so much more. As we grow older, we realise that none of them has given us peace or happiness, and then we seek them. But why don't we seek peace and happiness from the very beginning? If peace and happiness are so important to us, why don't we seek them since childhood?
Probably because we have peace as well as happiness to begin with, and then, in the process of seeking other things, we probably lose awareness of that peace and happiness within. But why does that happen? Why does a child seek a chocolate? To experience that feeling of high that is created on the tongue when the sugar, salt, and cocoa touch the taste buds. The first time the child tastes chocolate, his taste buds get stimulated, and he wants to repeat the experience. A similar experience takes place when he eats biscuits and chips. Momos and burgers make us feel the same way, too. We get addicted to that feeling of high and want more and more of the same.
As we grow up, the entire ecosystem around us makes us feel insecure. We feel insecure without friends, family, and a job. Wherever we go, we get to face very sharp questions. What are you doing? When will you get a job? People are so quick to judge us as failures, and we seek the support of family and friends to feel secure. Then we get to learn the tricks of the game and the winning formula. We work hard to get admission to a good college, then a good placement, a good job, a girlfriend, marriage, kids, a flat, and a car. Now we are successful. Nobody can judge us. We have got the points on our scoreboard that declare us a winner.
But the problem is that the scoreboard is not permanent. The more points we have on the scoreboard, the more we become anxious about losing them. It's one thing to make a position in the competition, and it's altogether a different thing to retain that position. Also, as we advance in the competition, we get to play at the district, national, and international levels. The players have very different skills. They can do anything to win the game. Competition is harsh and at times brutal. Circumstances are uncertain. There are many contingencies. Injuries are part of life at that level. We are not prepared for this. But at the same time, we can't afford to lose and face the same insecurities. We don't want to be a loser.
In this race, we forget that peace and happiness were always an integral part of us. We just wanted to taste the feeling of "high". We just wanted to "win over" the world. We wanted to taste that spike. In the process, we lost connection with inner peace and happiness. That feeling of a high took us away from that equanimity, and when it disappears, we fall into the abyss of existence and feel depressed. We fail to realise that the feeling of "low" is just the other side of the feeling of "high". Both will always go hand in hand. Since we lose awareness of the peace and happiness that always exist within us, as we ride the swing of highs and lows, we feel hollow inside and undertake a spiritual path to seek happiness and peace. The "achiever" within us makes it another target. Another winning formula fails to realise that happiness and peace shall remain distant until we get down from that swing. But the person riding on that swing is so mesmerised by that feeling of "high" that he can't get down. Rather, he creates a mental story that he will become happy by following certain techniques, helping a few, or undertaking certain rituals, which take him nowhere. He denies the simple fact that he has to do nothing to be happy, but just get down that swing.
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