One thing that really surprises me is that somebody starts drinking quite late in life. I can understand that during our childhood or early adulthood, we are very instinctive and fall into the trap of seeking social validation. All our friends drink and have parties and sometimes even force us, and we fall into the trap. But I have seen a few of the colleagues who start drinking much later. That really surprises me. Having got into the job and having so many opportunities to do the hard work and grow intellectually, why do people choose such an easy way to get that kick?
When we take liquor, we probably feel that sense of freedom and high. A feeling that we have untied many ropes tied around us. We feel free to express ourselves without inhibitions. But why do we tie the ropes around us in the very first instance? To please the people around us. To say the things that they like, that do not offend them. We do not dare to cross the limits which we have imposed on ourselves, and which we consider to be safe. Even in the closest of relations. That's why even the closest of relationships look so artificial. Leave aside the relationships; we do not remain true to ourselves. We may not like the job, yet we keep justifying it and doing the same till retirement because people perceive it as good. Because we get social status from the job. We do not like meeting many people, and yet we keep meeting because they provide us with a sense of security. We do not want to express ourselves freely because of the apprehension of a negative judgment.
Probably, suffocated in that dark room, we feel like untying the ropes around us for some time. That's why we look forward to partying so desperately. Those few moments are so precious. But why not the whole of life? Who stops us from being authentic in each and every moment? Probably the fear of being judged. We find ourselves alone, weak, and vulnerable. But judged by whom? The people who themselves have no idea or reality? Who are also driven by the narrative.
The whole world may believe the Earth is flat, but anyone who understands it is spherical would go against that narrative. The whole of the crowd may be mad about a street shop, but the one who has seen the dirty kitchen will not be able to eat the food from that shop. All of us see reality. All of us see so many deaths around us. By our 40s, almost all of us undergo one or the other experience where we see very close friends and relatives losing their children or suffering from terminal diseases. All of us have seen the reality of the world during the COVID-19 times. All of us have experienced one or the other natural disaster. All of us have seen many ups and downs in life. Yet when we make our brains believe that everything is permanent, they eventually become exhausted. It feels unable to carry the burden of lies. That's why it needs a few moments to let go of the burden and feel relaxed. An inauthentic way of living comes at a high cost to us.
But accepting the fragility of our existence is very painful. Of course, yes. But living with escape after escape is far more painful. We may try to convince our minds that our family will always stay with us, the wealth we have earned will always be handy in the moments of crisis, the connections we have built over time will come to our rescue in the moments of crisis, and since people consider us to be "good people" as per their standards, they will always stand by. But the fact is that even the most loving mother can't take away the pain. One has to bear it on one's own. Once we accept that vulnerability is real and no escape can help us, we accept death as the eternal truth and use whatever limited time we have on this earth, not in building more and more escapes, but in actually exploring our fullest potential. When we live each moment of our lives to the fullest, it does not matter whether we live a long or short life. We live a fulfilling life nevertheless.
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