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Desire to become a Messiah

I was really amazed to see the YouTube video of a spiritual leader who is among the most educated in the present generation of spiritual guides. He says that I am forced to always be well-dressed to make the YouTube channel popular, so that the message of the Bhagavad Gita can reach as many people as possible. He also says he feels free at night when he takes off his formal attire. He also says that he can't sleep for even 3 hours peacefully because the worry of the organisation keeps him awake. He is asking people to be fearless. I have also seen many of his videos, and generally, he talks a lot of sense. 

Then I watched another video of J Krishnamurti wherein he says that nobody can give anything to anybody. A flower will bloom and will also spread its fragrance. Anyone who passes by enjoys the smell. Flower is just doing what it naturally does. It does not go out of its way to help somebody. Similarly, the trees produce oxygen naturally, and just because human beings have established industries that produce large amounts of CO2 and human beings need more oxygen, the trees will not speed up the production of oxygen. Kabir, Meera, and so many lived their lives naturally. They had unconditional love for the divine, and they lived with that love. In the process, their fragrance spread all throughout the world, and people like us are benefiting even today.

I don't know: when we decide to help others, is it because of love for others, or because we have a strong desire to become a messiah? I often think over this phenomenon: when we offer a ten-rupee note to a beggar, and he refuses to accept it, we are naturally hurt. It is because he crushed our ambition to be a donor. We are happy to receive the donor tag. If that is not the case, we should be happy that the other person has self-respect, and we should be happy that he is able to stand for himself. But, for us, the most important thing is the tag of being a donor. Feel good about helping somebody at a very low cost. Now, somebody may want that tag at a very high level. He wants to "become" somebody who is a messiah of millions.

The most important thing in the spiritual journey is the source of motivation. Generally, it is to either acquire something such as some out-of-the-world experience, heaven, occult powers, or even peace, or it is to become somebody like a donor, a good man, a messiah, or a great man. So long as there is a drive to acquire or become, it is just the play of ego in a different form. When the source is love, it operates at a very different level. Love is a matter beyond the domain of body and mind. Love means an undivided connection that can't exist in a world of division. When Meera loves Krishna, will it make a difference whether Krishna is born in India or America? Would it matter whether He is Hindu or Christian? Would it matter whether He is black or white? 

Love is a connection at the level of formless consciousness. When somebody is actually in love with something or somebody, his entire existence is guided by that, and still there is nothing to acquire or become. At the level of consciousness, everyone is complete. Everybody will wake up at the right time, and forcefully trying to open a caterpillar's wings may be fatal to its life. One can just set an example so that the person who has matured to a certain level may see the example and emulate. One can also share experiences so that someone whose journey has matured may be inspired. Even Krishna did not try to change even Bhishma, leave aside Duryodhana. There is no anxiety or ambition. What ambition does Meera have in love? She, in fact, left whatever she had. Why would she be anxious? Anxiety arises only when the ego feels it is the doer. As soon as an electron is observed, it starts behaving like a particle. same is the case with us. As soon as we attach a motive to purity or consciousness, it turns into ego. Love has no purpose; it can't have. Love with expectations, that the beloved will behave in a particular manner, is nothing but the play of ego. 


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