Every one of us must have memories of going to a hill station in childhood and being amazed by the different kinds of stones and pebbles on the banks of mountain rivers. We used to feel excited and pick some of these pebbles. Similarly, we will go to a hill station, get excited to see the pine cones, and pick some in our backpack, only to realise soon that it has become too heavy. Life offers us amazing experiences, but it does not want us to carry them home. You go for a walk, and a very nice wind is blowing; we can't carry that home. We meet a friend and have a wonderful discussion. We can't guarantee we'll have the same discussion when we meet next time. We travel and see some beautiful scenes in the sky, but we can't recreate them at will.
The human brain has this amazing capacity to create. It has created roads, buildings, machines, aeroplanes, computers, mobiles, and so many different types of machines. We created so many things, only to be buried by the weight of our creations, because, like that boy who picks up pebbles and pine cones in his backpack, we, too, want to pick up and carry all these creations. We have not learned to drop these.
We developed communities and societies so that we can stay together safely. Communities also offered wonderful opportunities for the division of work. Someone can grow crops, someone can teach, someone can cook, someone can protect the community from external threats, and someone can build. It offers each individual the opportunity to explore whatever he enjoys in his life, with a sense of security. While the community was supposed to serve the individuals and make their lives better, the individuals have not been able to keep the community in its proper place, and eventually, the validation of society has become so central to our existence that we give away even our freedom and love out of fear of social disapproval. We have somehow picked up the pebbles and pine cones in our bags and feel their burden constantly on our backs, yet somehow oblivious to the simple solution: we just need to drop those pebbles and cones to feel light.
Relationships are meant to be places where we share our thoughts and emotions with each other. That's the most fundamental purpose of relationships. We come together to share our journey and aspirations. It's difficult to trek a mountain, but when we have the company of someone who shares the same aspiration, we keep trekking and talking, and the difficult trek looks easy. However, in this world, we often develop expectations in relationships, and those relationships slowly become burdensome. Again, we do not know that we are carrying the burden of the pebbles and pine cones in our backpack.
Dropping off society and relationships does not mean leaving them to become a sanyasi. It just means keeping them in the right place. The pebbles have their place on the bank of the river, and the pine cones have their right place in the mountains. We can see them, experience them, and be amazed by their shape and wide variety. But they have their right place in the mountains. Similarly, the community has its right place in the public domain. It can't enter the sphere of personal freedom. One has to let go of the fear of social validation when it comes to personal freedom, it will suffocate the possibilities of individual growth and exploration. Relationships, when they become controlling and dominating, can be quite suffocating. Dropping off all these pebbles and pine cones from our backpacks and keeping them in their right place is the key to freedom. They look beautiful when we keep them in the right place. The purpose of community and relationships is to facilitate individuals in exploring their fullest potential. It's not the other way round. They should actively help an individual explore his fullest potential, which he could not have explored on his own.
Comments