Brahmcharya is said to be an essential component of spiritual practices. Many people take sanyasa to move away from the world full of desires. While many feel that this world is for enjoyment, and one should enjoy to the fullest extent. I watched a movie long back titled "Samsara" wherein a Buddhist monk meditates in a cave for a long time, but he has desires left. He goes on a ritual to a village and falls in love with a woman. He gives up the monkhood and marries that lady. In the process, he fought with other villagers and had one more affair, finally realising that it was all futile to return to the monastery. The point I want to drive home is that it is also not certain whether one will be free of desires, whether one is a monk or a family man.
I am not sure what's a good way to get rid of the desires. To fulfil them so that they drop naturally, or to abstain from them. Many people abstain from money. I have seen honest officers always being compared with corrupt ones. Though they have chosen the path of honesty, they always disdain those who are corrupt. There is some internal comparison going on all the time. Suppose I decide to leave the dirt and stay at a clean place. Why would I compare myself with the person who decides to live in that dirt? I would pity him, and in fact, if I have love and compassion towards him, I would try to help him also to come out of that. Why would I feel deprived of the dirt? I have also seen people having billions and yet not being satisfied. They do not know what money is for in their lives, yet money has become the sole purpose of their lives.
It is difficult to say what the best way to drop is. To keep doing something over a period of time for the mind to be saturated? Or to abstain from the desires? I feel that it is none of these. We may keep trying any of these methods throughout our lives, but they will not work. The rich will keep growing greedier, and the poor will keep growing needier. I feel that the right path has already been shown to us by Lord Shiva. To stay aware always. He will build a palace for Parvati, called Lanka, and yet be fully aware of its fate. He remains fully aware of what's going to be the fate of everything in this world. That's why we pray to Lord Shiva with this mantra:
ॐ त्र्यम्बकं यजामहे सुगन्धिं पुष्टिवर्धनम् |
उर्वारुकमिव बन्धनान्मृत्योर्मुक्षीय माऽमृतात् ||
We pray for the "vardhan" or increase of "sugandhi" and "pushti". "Sugandhi" means awareness of the divine. When we smell something, we instantly remember. "Pushti" means inner strength or the inner connection representing love and compassion. When "sagandhi" and "pushti" increase, the attachment to all the objects of desire drops like a ripe fruit drops from the branch of a tree. It's effortless. Thus, Lord Shiva has already shown us the way. We neither need to make efforts in abstaining from the objects of desire, nor do we need to make efforts to achieve the objects of desire and consume. We just need to have the "sugandhi" of the divine and make ourselves "pusth" or "contended" with love and compassion. All the desires will drop automatically. A mother may hold on to a dead baby very tightly to her chest. Even if you take the baby away forcefully, she will keep holding the baby in her mind. It's only awareness of the meaning of life and death that's going to help her get rid of the grief.
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