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Who should be sorry?

Yesterday I watched the movie "Masoon" directed by Shekhar Kapoor. What a wonderful film, and I was surprised to see the maturity of Indian cinema in the 1970s. The character of DK played by Nasiruddin Shah has a happy family with two daughters, with the Character of Indu played by Shabana Azmi as his wife, and with two little daughters. Everything goes well until he gets to know about his son Rahul from a relationship that he had when he visited Nainital. The mother of the child died, and now he has to take care of his son. When his son comes home, his wife goes through a very tough time. She rejects Rahul and constantly insults and one fine day, the son finds out about his father and gets broken inside. What pinches him especially is that his father is not able to accept him socially. One scene that especially moved me was when he said sorry to Shabana Aajmi. 

https://youtube.com/clip/Ugkx21N2o-4Kts29ExXS-f-U4SPv7whv3E4B?si=UjMzi7Xie3UCh6Zs

Why does that young kid have to say sorry? I think that the entire society should say sorry to the kid. Why does he have to suffer that much? What is his fault? His father did something that he does not dare to own up to. Father is unable to own up because the entire society has made the family the center of existence. The sole parameter of a successful and happy life is whether you have married and have kids and got them settled so that the kids may marry, have kids, and get them settled. I really don't know how love can be confined to only three or four people. Isn't it utter selfishness to confine our existence to those 3-4 people? Just because this shameless selfishness is promoted by society, is it justified? Isn't it very convenient for the people who have a "happy" family to ignore the pain and sufferings of the rest of the world? Isn't such a society quite cruel to those who do not have that "happy family"? What gives Indu the right to insult Rahul? Isn't it her own insecurity about losing the title of having a "happy family"?

So long as these "entitled" people do not see the puncture in their own "happy family", they sit in judgement over others. Many of them are so unlucky that they never get to experience that puncture in their concept of "happy family" and remain ignorant of reality all through their lives. They die as ignorant as they lived their lives. Love and compassion do not touch them. Indu is lucky to have this experience that gives her an opportunity to break free of the concept of "happy family," and she can extend that at least to include Rahul as a part of her family. At least, there is some growth. 

How can love and compassion be limited by any mental concept? Whether it's the idea of family, caste, religion, nation, or anything else, love is universal. When we connect to our inner being, we connect to all living beings. We connect to life itself. When we connect to life, divisions lose their meaning. Rahul's mind isn't clouded by those divisions, which is why he says sorry to Indu. He understands the pain she's experiencing. However, it takes her quite a while to realize Rahul's pain because her anger towards DK overshadows her compassion for him. Eventually, she is able to reflect and regain her purity. How many of us could do the same? The entitled and privileged who have everything in life are often more depressed than those with less. The more we gain, the more selfish we become. That's why Buddha said that those who are unaware and find comfort are the unluckiest because they lack the opportunity to see reality clearly. Repeatedly telling our kids that their life's purpose is only to get a good job, marry, have two kids, and live happily is the biggest lie we tell. Sadly, they fall into the same trap, living hollow lives just like their parents. 


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