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"Swadharma" of the Children

 I wonder why so many of us spend our entire lives in a very limited frame? Is it the "Fear of the Unknown" or the "Fear of Missing the Known Comforts"? How could Mahatma Gandhi leave the comforts and enter into a completely unknown territory and fight for the rights of the blacks in South Africa? Did he not have the fear of the unknown? How could Sri Aurobindo enter into a completely known area after he engaged with the freedom struggle? How could Columbus and Vasco da Gama face the fear of the unknown? How could Rama leave the comforts and pleasures of the palace and enter the domain of the unknown? What did these people have within themselves that is not there in ordinary human beings? Was there something common in these extraordinary beings? How come so many people, even after passing IITs and IIMs and graduating from the best professional colleges, get caught in the trap of known comforts and fail to grow over their lifetime?

There is at least one factor that is common to all the great personalities. None of them was guided by the extraneous rewards. Their actions were not guided by the things that ordinarily attract people. They did not want to "become" somebody. Mahatma Gandhi did not want to become the Prime Minister or President of India. Sri Aurobindo did not want to form a grand spiritual cult and become its head. Rama did not want to become the king of Ayodhya. Krishna did not want to become the king of Mathura. 

Another factor common in all these personalities is that they "did" what they "loved". That is why they got instant reward in the form of contentment. They were always in a state of flow. Mahatma Gandhi wanted to serve humanity and experiment with his life to understand the nature of reality. He did the same the whole of his life, and his entire life was an "Experiment with Truth". Rama's life is Ramayana, which inspires the whole of humanity. It is because he did what he "loved". He loved to make friends and fight for truth, and that is what he did when he went with Vishvamitra to the forest, in the forest when he went for 14 years, in Kiskindha as well as in Lanka. That is what Krishna did the whole of his life. He gave the beautiful message of the Gita even on the battlefield of Kurukshetra.

How could these great personalities do what they loved to do, and why do most of us end up living our lives as a life of compulsion? It is because these people discovered their "Swadharma" much before they fall into the trap of "external rewards". Each one of us is different. We have different natures. Our nature is reflected in our horoscope in the form of the alignment of different planets representing different forces of nature. Some have strong Jupiter and that's why have a natural inclination to explore the cosmic laws, while some have strong Mars and are therefore full of physical energy, some have a strong Venus and therefore have a natural inclination for execution and quantum secrets, some have a strong Sun and therefore natural entrepreneurs, while some have strong Moon and therefore are good at arts and expression. It takes some time to understand our "Swadharma" and hone our skills in that direction. Unfortunately, much before we get to discover our "Swadharma", our parents and the society inculcate a deep sense of insecurity within us, and we become desperate to get those "extraneous rewards" to make us safe. We fail to observe that the sense of insecurity is due to our inability to understand our "Swadharma" and act accordingly. The more our actions are driven by the "extraneous rewards" and the more we will feel insecure because the entire drive to get those "extraneous rewards" is because we feel insecure and more we are desperate to get those rewards and "become" somebody, the more we are disconnected internally with our "Swadharma".

Probably, our biggest responsibility as parents and as members of society is to help the kids understand their "Swadharma" so that their actions are not driven by the restlessness to become secure or to get some comforts, but rather their actions are guided by their "Swadharma". Their actions are guided by what they love to do. Often we mistake the "driven" people for the people who "love what they do". I feel that we can easily make out the difference. The people who are driven by extrinsic rewards are often restless. The moment results are not in line with their expectations, they become stressed and depressed. On the other hand, the people whose actions are guided by their "Swadharma" are never restless because they get instant rewards. Their "action" is their "reward". They do what they love and therefore they derive satisfaction out of their actions themselves. That is why they do not become restless. That is why they do not have a midlife crisis. That is why they do not get stressed and depressed. That is the difference between Arjuna and Karna. Karna is fighting the battle to prove to the world that he is the greatest archer. On the other hand, Arjuna is fighting the battle of Kurukshetra after having understood his "Swadharma". Unless our children understand their "Swadharma", they are likely to be "bored" with their lives and develop mental disorders at some stage of their lives, and at that time, it becomes quite difficult to change the fundamental framework of their lives. 


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