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Fixed Mindset

One of the allegations that we face quite often is that we have changed. Especially, the relatives and old friends have this allegation. Most of the allegations come from friends and relatives who got settled in the same city where we were born and brought up and assimilated into that culture. When we, as children, were not so exposed, we presumed that culture and the mindset based on that culture to be absolute. However, as we get exposed, we understand the relativity of each culture and mindset and learn to place each one of them contextually. That brings growth as a human being and probably the ones who have not been able to grow to find it alien and make this type of comment to avoid any challenges to their fixed mindset.

For example, different societies have different types of cultures and rituals. Some societies believe that eating non-vegetarian food is against the religion. Then we meet people belonging to the same religion and living in the coastal area to realize that there the same religion allows fish to be offered in the religious places as an offering to God. It gives you a different perspective that the traditions are influenced by geographical factors. We become wiser to adjust our mindsets to accept that and then examine logically whether it is good for us to eat non-vegetarian food or not.

As we grow and get exposed to different cultures, we understand the relativity of the concepts of good and bad, right and wrong. We understand that mindset changes with experience. We can make different structures with the Lego blocks. Our parents and society make one structure out of the blocks and we get so mesmerized and fixated with the same that we do not allow that structure to be changed ever, then we have just wasted the capacity of the blocks. Our mind is so full of possibilities of all types and if we remain fixated on a particular mindset, we make our life quite narrow.

However, this thought process brings certain challenges. People say that if we change our mindset based on exposure and experience then where is the stability of the character. We will be like rolling stones not having any ground to stand on. How will the people believe us and interact with us if they are not sure of our mindset? I feel that the problem lies in the manner we communicate with each other. Most of the communications are so shallow. We communicate with the past and not the present. I see that most of the discussions are just sharing past experiences. In fact, in most of the communications, we are so fixed in our mindsets that we hardly listen to the other. We keep judging the other person throughout the communication and either we go on an overdrive to defend our mindset or to attack his mindset. 

Probably, there is hardly any communication. Rather there are just debates and psychological warfare. Communication just needs a basic understanding that all the thoughts are just different structures created out of the blocks and actually all of the thoughts are contextual. There is only one absolute truth. The entire creation is taking place from the same consciousness. Rest everything and experience is contextual. The board of the mind is to draw different pictures and shapes and not to draw one and get fixated on that. That's a waste of the capacity of the Board. A tree does not hold on to the fruits that it produces. It just drops them as they ripen and get ready for the next round of fruits. 

Life is so rich that each moment we come across infinite experiences if we are willing to observe. We can make infinite shapes out of the Lego blocks provided to us by nature. We can draw infinite pictures on the board. No shape or picture is right or wrong. If somebody holds on to a particular shape or picture tightly, he makes his own life limited. The moment we realize the capacity of the board or blocks, we connect to each other as if two kids play with the blocks together. When we discuss with each other with that openness, we draw the most beautiful pictures on the board and are not afraid to rub even those in our further interactions. We play with the same Lego blocks with different friends and do not get fixated on the structures we created the last time we played. The beauty of a river lies in its flow and not being confined to a dam. Even dams can not confine the rivers indefinitely. 


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