I see so many stressors around. Power cuts in the morning, fear of kids missing the school bus, traffic jams, farmers' agitation, and related border closure, a society that is ever ready to jump to judgments to make your life hell, imperfect systems in different organizations we deal with, dealing with egoistic people, unfulfilling relationships, dealing with self-centered people, and the list may go on forever.
All these things cause stress. Probably because we are stuck with something and these stressors threaten those attachments. We are attached to the comfort of taking a bath with warm water and power cut threatens that comfort. We are attached to our schedule and missing the bus by the kids will disturb that schedule that we do not like. Traffic jams keep us on the roads for a longer time than we plan for that. Judgment by society is not a problem at all rather the problem is that we are afraid of rejection from society because we seek security in acceptance by society. Imperfect systems are also not a problem rather they act as stressors because we are afraid of surprises and doubt our capacity to handle such surprises. Similarly, dealing with egoistic people is a problem because we wish to avoid conflicts either because we do not wish to spend energy on that or because we are too concerned about our social image and do not want a dent in the same. We do not have the courage to say no to unfulfilling relationships and they carry on to make our lives further unfulfilling.
Overall, it appears that the root cause of the stress in life is our fixed mindset. Since childhood, we have been conditioned to divide the whole of this world into likes and dislikes. Based on cultural and religious conditioning, we make certain meanings of life. Life is about a happy family, a good career, relationships, social service, or knowledge and learning. We make these things as the center of our life. This center of life decides likes and dislikes, dos, and don'ts. Whenever the situations support us, we feel at ease and whenever we face adversities, we feel threatened and stressed.
Some will argue that unless we set these meanings of life, how will we get the motivation to move ahead. How did Krishna get the motivation to be a charioteer of Arjuna in the battle of Kurukshetra? He was happy in Dwarka. There was no reason for him to participate in the battle of Kurukshetra, especially as a charioteer. He participated in the battle because he lived life in each moment with complete awareness without any fixed idea of life. He is aware that it is the battle between the Pandavas and Kauravas and Arjuna has certain fixed concepts of morality in his mind and he can not fight the battle unless he understands the true meaning of life. Krishna understood his role in the battle of Kurukshetra and accordingly played that role beautifully. He did not act like a warrior since it was a battle for Pandavas to fight.
The story of Ram and Ravana portrays that so beautifully. Ravana had centered his life around accumulation. Accumulation of wealth and power. He centered his life so much around himself that he considered himself to be the greatest in this world. No doubt that gave him motivation. Not ordinary motivation, but the motivation to carry out the most difficult penance to please lord Shiva. He worked on himself to become strong enough to defeat even the devas in the battle. But his mindset became so fixated that he stopped listening to anybody and to the extent that when all his family members including his wife and brother warned him and requested him to hand over Sita to Rama, he did not listen to them.
Isn't a fixed mindset a step forward in the direction of becoming Ravana? No doubt it gives us motivation. The stronger the mindset the stronger the motivation. However, do we actually want to become Ravana? Even after all the fights, when Rama killed Ravana, he asked Lakshmana to go to Ravana and listen to his last words of wisdom because he connected to Ravana at the level of soul. He knew that whatever happens in the world of forms is temporary.
Can't we live life with a constant awareness of reality with the realization that all forms are temporary? If we make the temporary the center of our lives, there is no doubt that whenever we see that center being threatened by the situations, we will be stressed. The greater the accumulation and the greater is our fixation and the greater is the stress. I do not see any rationale behind fixations. They make life so limited. Awareness of this reality sets us free of these fixations and we regain the freedom. A bonded man will always try to bind others and a free man will always give space. Let us live a life of freedom and let others also live a life free of fixations and bondages.
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