It is almost impossible for most of us to surrender completely to the divine. We all have different ambitions which we want to pursue. Some of us want to earn a lot of wealth, while some want to have all types of fun, some want to take care of the family, some want to form friendships and companionship, and some want to roam around the world and explore different places, some want to explore different fields of knowledge. So long as the situations support us, we feel happy, confident, and proud of ourselves. As and when situations stop supporting us, we start feeling under-confident, fearful, and anxious.
The sense of "Doership" is strong to the extent that when something does not go our way, we start holding ourselves guilty for not having made the correct decisions. Basically, we carry an image of not only the doer but also a perfect one who is quite intelligent enough to understand the interplay of different forces and nature operating inside ourselves, other human beings with whom we interact, and the entire ecosystem.
This is quite natural. We all are representatives of the divine who is a perfect doer. We somehow lose awareness of being a part of the divine but carry the memories of being a perfect doer. It is like this laptop on which this typing is taking place. In a normal scenario, the laptop is connected to the internet. Whatever is typed on the blogger, gets checked by the internet for spelling, the internet recommends spelling corrections, and wherever it finds errors, the post automatically gets uploaded on the blogger. Some days there is no internet. Now the same thing is getting typed on the blogger but there is no spelling check. There is no auto-upload. There is no support available that is dependent upon the Internet.
I feel that we all behave similarly. We have lost awareness of that divine connection within. As a result, we operate with different types of limitations. The intellect knows very little. The emotional mind takes over due to our limited understanding of life. It creates all types of fears and insecurities. These fears and insecurities give rise to different types of ambitions. These fears and insecurities are stored deep into the unconscious layers of the emotional mind. The disconnected being plays into the hands of these fears, insecurities, and resultant ambitions. He makes different decisions driven by them and since there is a blur of remembrance of the divine self, we feel guilty of doing something wrong in the process.
So long as the divine connection is off, our actions will be driven by our ambitions. A sense of "Doership" will always make us feel guilty about our decisions. Some suggest that do away with the sense of "Doership" and surrender to the divine. Probably a "Unit" that has lost connection with the divine can never surrender. The "unit" feels too fearful and insecure to surrender. The "Doership" in such a state of ignorance is the foremost defense. An ignorant "unit" can not let it go.
The only possibility of coming out of the fears and insecurities is when this "ignorant unit" becomes aware of the divine connection and that awareness makes it understand the unfolding of the divine plan. The "unit" understands that the situations that appear as problems are nothing but the challenges that are necessary for the evolution of the "unit". After all, when an athlete is being trained, he does not wish away the challenges. He knows very well that all these challenges are part and parcel of his journey to become a champion. He has full faith in the coach and faces each of the challenges thrown at him with firm determination.
Probably, the awareness of divine connection may come only with observation. An observation without any choice. Observation as it is. With no likes and dislikes, no rights or wrongs, no pleasures or pains. This choiceless observation enables us to see life from a broader perspective that enables us to understand reality as it is. We observe our fears, insecurities, and ambitions. We see clearly how these are a result of our limited understanding of life. Such observation also gives us the ability to experience that divine connection and how that connection is helping us evolve and grow. How He, as a parent, understands what is truly required for our growth, far better than ourselves, and yet we like an adamant child always try to make his task difficult and how He like a loving parent never leaves us despite all our stubbornness.
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