The purest form of love in this world is the love of parents towards their children. Most of the other relationships in this world are not so pure. When a child is born, he is in the purest form, completely naked. He has no likes or dislikes, rights or wrongs. He does not know any language. He does not understand any moral values. The parents observe the child in the purest form, like an empty vessel or a clean slate. They form a relationship with that purity.
Slowly, the child grows up in society and comes into contact with matter and thoughts. His senses get attracted to different objects of pleasure and try to run away from different objects of pain. That gives rise to different desires, and to fulfil these desires, he acquires different tools. The most important tool in the toolkit is social validation. It's easy to survive if we follow the rules of society, or at least pretend to. There are many written and unwritten rules of a society. Consciously and unconsciously, the child starts following those rules.
So far, there is no problem. The problem arises when the writing on the board becomes primary and the board becomes secondary. Slowly, the child starts identifying with the writings to the point that he loses awareness of the Board's potential to be rubbed and rewritten. One becomes too attached to the writing on the Board and confines one's existence to it. Not only that, out of ignorance, he starts identifying others also with their writings. The soul-to-soul connection gets lost. The purity of a parent-child relationship is no longer there in other relationships.
Can we see the people we form relationships with beyond their writings? Each one of us lives with our own writings. We are conscious of just a small portion of these writings. While living, we unconsciously absorb so many experiences, and the conscious mind is not aware of many of these writings on the Board. In the process, we keep judging people based on their writings. In fact, we hide many of these writings, consciously or unconsciously, to get a few brownie points. Thus, we start pretending. A computer is programmed with machine language, but on the screen, a different interface appears. The software is like the writing on the board, and the interface is like the self-image we create to pretend to be someone else. We maintain the self-image we project to society and want it to confirm it. We feel that helps us survive better.
However, in the process of strong identification with the writings and self-image, we compromise our souls. The soul keeps crying for freedom. Since we get disconnected from our own world, there is no question of connecting with others' images. The relationships become shallow. Only self-image to the image of others. When two people come close, sometimes they try to read each other's programming, going beyond the interface. Most of the time, a friend's inner programming has so many shades that do not conform to our self-image. Either we confine our relationship to the interface in such cases, or we become selective.
It's quite rare in a relationship for two people to go beyond the interface and the programming and connect at the level of the soul. Once that happens, it becomes the most beautiful relationship in this world. Such relationships are based on true love, unadulterated by the interface or the programming. Such relationships have the capacity to set the soul free. When such free souls connect with each other, the most wonderful relationships form.
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